Losing Her Mind
by Angel N Darkness
Summary: Kensi feels as if she is losing her mind since nobody in her family is helping her plan her Grandmother's funeral. Will she accept Callen's help? Will she trust him to hold her up when she feels as if she is going to lose it completely?


A/N: So I had an idea for a Oneshot with Callen and Kensi but then I got the news that my Grams died this evening... So I'm going to do this oneshot and then the original idea I had but the idea I had has turning into a multi chapter fic... I can tell you now that this oneshot will be angsty because I'm hoping that in writing this it will finally get me to stop crying for even just a few minutes... Warning: This story is a little OOC and AU... But as I said before I needed to get my pain and anger out because of certain members of my family... Another warning is that some of the words Kensi says in this story is based on what I have said because of certain members... If you don't like swear words then don't read...

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA

Kensi tried to keep her feelings hid all day at work. There were so many times that she just wanted to break down and cry but she fought and she fought to keep the tears at bay. She had thought that she had done a pretty good job on keeping the fact that something was wrong hidden but little did she know that one certain guy on the team noticed that something was wrong.

She had thought that she was strong enough to do everything on her own but now she was doubting that ability. She still couldn't believe that her Grandmother was dead. She couldn't believe that none of her extended family was even willing to help make the arrangements. She may not talk to her aunts and uncles or cousins but she knew that they talked to her Grandmother. She didn't understand how they could be so cold hearted and cold blooded as to not help with any of the arrangements or phone calls.

As she sat down at her desk she groaned. She couldn't handle much more of anything and act like everything was alright. She was about ready to blow her stack and she knew that when she did that it wasn't going to be a pretty sight. She knew that as soon as something set her off that nothing and nobody could keep whatever or whoever it was that set her off safe from her.

When her cell phone rang and she saw who it was her blood started to boil and she answered it her phone with "Blye."

"Kensi, it's your aunt Meredith. I just wanted to let you know that I want my Mother's jewelery. Meredith said on the other end of the phone.

Kensi gasped so loud that Callen and Sam who had just sat down at their desk looked in her direction in concern but Kensi didn't even notice them as her anger boiled up and over and she said "YOU WILL NOT TOUCH GRANDMOTHER'S JEWELERY. YOU WILL JUST HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL HER WILL IS READ! YOU CAN'T EVEN WAIT UNTIL SHE IS BURIED BEFORE YOU START MAKING YOUR DEMANDS? JUST WHAT KIND OF WOMAN ARE YOU? HELL YOU CAN'T EVEN HELP WITH THE FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS AND I'M DOING EVERYTHING ON MY OWN WITHOUT ANY HELP FROM YOU OR ANYONE ELSE. WHAT RIGHT DO YOU HAVE TO TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT AND WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU CAN'T EVEN BOTHER TO DO SOMETHING BESIDES GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOUR GOD DAMN SELF?"

Kensi was shaking and anger and she couldn't control her actions any longer. This was just the last straw. She couldn't keep it all in any longer. She picked up something off of her desk and threw it not caring what it was or where it hit. She just knew that if she didn't get some of her anger out that she would leave work and drive over to her aunt's and slap the hell out of her. She couldn't believe the nerve of the woman.

Meredith gasped shocked at the rage Kensi had in her voice and she spat "You don't talk to me that way you little whore. She's my mother and if I want her jewelery I'll get it and there isn't a thing you can do to stop me."

Kensi slammed her hand down on her desk and said "WATCH ME. YOU FORGET WHO I KNOW. YOU WILL NOT TOUCH GRANDMOTHER'S THINGS UNTIL THE WILL IS READ. IF YOU SO MUCH AS LIFT ONE THING OUT OF HER HOUSE I'LL HAVE YOUR ASS SITTING IN JAIL SO FAST THAT YOUR HEAD WILL SPIN. DO NOT TEST ME. YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT YOURSELF. I'M THE YOUNGEST ONE IN THIS FAMILY YET I'M THE ONE DOING EVERYTHING. I DON'T SEE YOU LIFTING ONE FINGER TO HELP PLAN YOUR MOTHER'S FUNERAL. I DON'T SEE YOU OFFERING TO HELP PAY FOR IT. ALL I SEE IS YOU EXPECTING ME TO DO EVERYTHING. WELL I'M DOING IT ALL BUT IT WILL BE DONE THE WAY I WANT IT DONE. NOW I HAVE WORK TO DO SO DON'T BOTHER ME AGAIN!"

With that Kensi closed her cell phone and slammed her hand back on her cell phone. She was still shaking in anger and hadn't noticed yet that Callen was standing behind her or that Sam had got up from his desk and walked away leaving Callen to calm Kensi down.

Callen put his hand on Kensi's shoulder and said "Come on Kensi you need to calm down. I don't know what's going on but I'm here if you need to talk."

Kensi swung around to face Callen in shock and then before she even registered what she was doing she threw herself into his arms and started crying. She had been holding back the tears for to long and the anger left her drained and not able to fight the tears off anymore. She held onto him tightly as she cried her heart out.

Callen stood still for a moment but then wrapped his arms around Kensi pulling her further into his body. He knew that this wasn't the time to think it but he couldn't believe how good she felt in his arms. He has always liked her but never got up the nerve to tell her. Now he was wondering if maybe this wasn't the perfect time to show her just how much he cared for her. He didn't know exactly what was going on but from what he gathered from the phone call was that her Grandmother had died and nobody in her family was helping her with any of the arrangements. He decided right there and then and vowed to himself that he would do whatever it was he could to help her. He didn't like seeing her so sad and heart broken and if he was honest he didn't like seeing the lost look in her eyes.

Kensi took in a deep breath to try to calm herself down some and when she did she smiled slightly as she took in Callen's scent. She couldn't believe that she had thrown herself into his arms but now that she was there she didn't regret it. She had always liked him but was just too afraid to tell him and see if maybe he felt the same way as her. She knew that he had meant what he said when he told her he was there if she needed to talk. She decided then and there to take him up on it.

She pulled back slightly and said "I do need to talk. But are you sure that you want to listen?"

Callen let Kensi pull back but he kept his arms around her and he nodded. "I'm sure that I want to listen. What's wrong Kensi?"

Kensi took in a deep breath and let Callen pull her with him to where he was leaning against his desk with her still firmly in his arms and finally said "My Grandmother died and my Aunts, Uncles and Cousins are doing nothing to help. They expect me to make the arrangements and pay for the funeral and make all the phone calls that need to be made. I really don't mind doing it because I love my Grandmother but it just gets to me that they aren't willing to help. I'm doing everything and it's killing me. I don't have the time to break down because I have to be the strong one. I have to be the one who keeps their head. Although I think I lost my head for a little bit but I needed to because if I hadn't then when I finally would have it would have been so much worse. I'm alone and I'm doing everything by myself and it's not right. They all have someone there for them but yet I'm the one alone and doing everything and having to keep my head up and stay strong. My aunt called me a whore on the phone just now."

Callen's mouth dropped open slightly but then he closed it and pulled Kensi closer to him once more and kissed her on the head. "You're not alone Kensi. You don't have to do this alone. Let me in. Let me help you. I have always liked you but lately I've learned that it's more than liking you. I know that right now you can't think about a relationship but I hope that maybe sometime in the near future you will think about a relationship and that the person you'll want to be in one with is me. What I'm trying to say is that I think I love you Kensi. Will you please let me in and help you?"

Kensi stood in Callen's arms in shock. She couldn't believe what she had just heard him say. But as she looked in his eyes she saw that everything he said was the truth. She could see the love he felt for her shining in his eyes. She then smiled and leaned forward slightly and brushed her lips across his.

Callen smiled as Kensi pulled back to look at him and he smiled even more when she said "I've thought about a relationship with you too Callen. Yes, I will let you in and let you help me. I can't do this on my own. If I do I'm going to lose it."

This time it was Callen who leaned forward and brushed his lips across Kensi's before pulling back. "You don't have to do it alone Kensi. I'm here to help you with anything you need. You also know that Sam and everyone else will help you with whatever needs doing also. Your biological family may not want to help you but we do and we will."

It was then that Kensi admitted that her coworkers were her family and that they were a better family to her then her biological family. She settled her head on Callen's shoulder as she let his strength help hold her up. She knew then that she would get through this and not just because of Callen. She would get through this because of all of her family.


End file.
